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Thursday, October 30, 2008

Right Fielders

Mike Singletary drops pants! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I love it!

Niki Taylor having a baby. With a dude she knew for 3 wks before getting engaged, and just a few months before getting hitched.

Becks thinks soccer players are overpaid. that's the pot calling the kettle black.

Posh running NY marathon?! really?! i just wanna see her in sneakers.

The most horrific broken leg videos. EVER. yet... i can't stop watching.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

New Job: Day 3, AM Edition

Day 3 has started off well. Despite an accident on 95, which was on the shoulder and shouldn't have caused traffic, but it did because everyone had to look at it, I managed to get here at 7:45! WOO! 15 min before I was technically supposed to be here, which means I can leave at 4:15 today!

On the drive in, I saw the best license plate ever: L8AGIN. If my plate is the most perfect one for me, this one comes in at a close second. LOVE IT. The only problem was it was 6:45 in the freaking morning and I couldn't call anyone to share the awesomeness.

On tap for today: shadowing Becky, which is a bit odd, because I feel like I've been working longer than she has - I was working with clients here before she was hired. I realize she's been doing this specific job much longer than me - ya know, since I have 2 days and 15 min under my belt. My supervisor told me yesterday that Becky was "the best" at pretty much everything, so I'm excited : ) We're going to the doctor with someone, and then doing a group home inspection, whatever that is. Should be interesting! I also get to make a supply list and start of (sort of) organize MY DESK!! Cuz, ya know, I have one of those now :-D

New Job: Day 2, part 2

After "relaxing" at my new job today, I went on a home visit with one of my coworkers. Then, after a few more minutes of "relaxing," I met with my new supervisor. Basically, I learned that my phone isn't working right, and I can't get into the system that lets me manage my timesheets, pay stubs, benefits, etc (which means I can't set up my benefits). My email also wasn't working, but we managed to get that fixed before I left. I also got my voicemail set up... although, again, my phone isn't working properly, sooooo not many people will get to hear it.

Tomorrow, I get to make a list of needed desk supplies and get all that stuff ordered, which should be fun... although it's been over 3 yrs since I last had a work desk, so I'm concerned I'll forget something obvious and major. I also get to shadow a coworker again, and learn about county cars and other fun things like that.

Sometime this week, I'll get my cell phone (boo), and next week I have TWO DAYS of training on our paperwork system. Big boo to that.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Right Fielders

The whole Mike Singletary Vernon Davis thing. This reminds me of Roy Williams sending one of UNC's stars to the locker room his first season as coach. I heart shit like that.

Alexander Ovechkin visits sick grandpa. I find this sad : (

Hottie Cristiano Ronaldo named best soccer player on the planet. AND he's a hottie!

Michael Phelps does private party appearances! Anyone want to give me $100k?! Please?

Jelena Jankovic is #1. And she didn't win a major all year.

Plaxico benched. damn he's having a rough year.

Did Brett Favre share trade secrets? If it happens all the time, and it's not against the rules, and the Lions lost the game, why does anyone care?

"I'm a solider" Kellen Winslow un-suspended. Goodie for him.

New Job: Day 2

I guess I skipped over Day 1, but I was tired last night, so yall will just have to deal.

Day 2 started out fine. In Day 1, I learned that leaving my house at 6:35 gets me to where I had to be today at 7:45. I needed to be there at 8, and the roads were wet from light rain all night, so I figured I'd leave a few minutes early to hopefully account for all the stupid drivers out there. I WAS SO SO SO SO WRONG.

I got out the door at 6:20 - and yall should all be WAY impressed with that, by the way. The traffic reports I heard said 95 N was heavy from dale city (me) through rt 1. Thats exactly what the deal was yesterday, so I stayed on 95 instead of bailing onto rt 1. BIG mistake. There was HORRID traffic for a few more miles, and I had no idea why. I surfed around for traffic reports, and they all said either 1. traffic was clear past rt 1 or 2. its heavy, with no explanation given. After barely moving for an HOUR, I finally got to the source - an accident taking up the right lane, and there were signs that it had originally taken up far more than that. Once I got past that, traffic completely broke up and I was doing 80 trying to make up for lost time. (It was at this point I finally started to hear that there was an accident. nice.) I wasn't able to fly along at 80 for very long, however. I'd heard reports that there was a cleared accident on 395 just before the 14th st. bridge. I didn't think much of it, as there was apparently one yesterday as well, and it didn't hinder my commute too badly. This was mistake #2. Long before the exit ramp for 495/Tysons split off, traffic came to a complete standstill. About 45 min later, I was finally able to get off 395 and start working my way towards where I needed to be. It was already 8:15 at this point, 15 min after my training had started. The only phone number I had was to my dept's HR dept, and they apparently don't get in until 9, so I just kept getting rolled into a voice mail, which was doing me no good. Eventually, my half asleep and panicked brain realized I should use 411 to call my new supervisor. I did, and she was able to get a note to the people teaching my training saying I was on my way... just very, very slowly.

Once I FINALLY got there, it took me like 10 min to find an open spot in the parking lot. I walked into the conference room at 9:20, a full THREE HOURS after I walked out my front door. Luckily, no one seemed to mind, and I was able to get full credit for the training, despite missing almost 1.5 hrs of the 4 hr class. Nice.

Now I'm sitting AT MY NEW DESK!! "relaxing" on my boss's orders, waiting to talk to her about... whatever you talk to your boss about on Day 2.

Hopefully my trip home won't be as heinous.

Sunday, October 26, 2008

Redskins Sunday!

Once again, I found fabulous inspiration on Chris Cooley's page, only this time the hottness was written by rookie QB Colt Brennan. (On a random note, I dig his name.) Here's his story...

This post is a lot like that TV show on MTV. The one where they say, “You think you know…but you have no idea” and in this case, you have no idea. My name is Colt Brennan. I'm a 6th round rookie QB, grew up in So Cal, played college ball in Hawaii, so I’d say I am a pretty laid back kind of guy. I wonder if they took that into consideration when they decided to issue lockers? Considering they saw fit to put me between Chris Cooley and Jason Taylor. At first you may think, "what an awesome experience," I get to be between two pro bowlers, potential hall of famers, dancers. Every day. For the next 5 months. What dream right? More like what a nightmare.

Chris (considering this will be posted on your blog) you’re a cool guy and it’s been pretty fun easing my way into the NFL watching you on a day-to-day basis. You make everyday a little different. But you’ve also made everyday for me a nightmare...
It all started when Jason decided to be tough guy on me one day, warning if I ever got in his way, or touched any of his stuff he would, "beat my ass.” Following this encounter something happened that soon became an everyday event. At first it was funny, but it eventually became a huge pain in my ass. Whenever Chris got his chance, he would do something. For example: he would take a fresh pair of Jason’s Jordan’s (probably sent directly by Michael Jordan) and hide them in my locker. Or maybe take all my dirty laundry and stack it high in front of Jason’s locker. Or better yet, being the great artist Chris is, he drew cartoons (depicting Jason doing… things not meant for children) and taped them on Jason's locker. In the end, who got blamed for it all? I did. Some stuff he probably actually believed was me, and some stuff he knew that I had played no part in any of it yet still tried to give me the blame. Why? Because he started to gain a lot of enjoyment by seeing me in agony.

Chris then started to lose interest, and he wouldn’t try so hard to implicate me into screwing with Jason, yet things kept happening. Like stolen shoes and computer print outs (that didn’t make Jason look so manly) and Jason began retaliating. All of the sudden I’d find my clothes and stuff piled far from my locker in the middle of the room. I began coming to my locker and seeing white tape out lining the boundaries where I was allowed to go (of course the space was not even reasonable), but that didn’t matter. At this point I suspected that Jason was actually messing with his own stuff just to find reason, to mess with me. Like wrapping my helmet up in tape or dismantling it, just to be a pain. Perhaps his best feat was lacing my helmet and visor with Vaseline, which meant I spent the practice in a slippery helmet and no visor, because I couldn’t see out of it (the Vaseline took forever to wipe off).

So thus, this has been my life for the past couple months, and I’ve come to realize what I am this year, and what maybe a lot of rookies are across the league. I’m their pawn, which they maneuver for their pure enjoyment! But don’t worry all you people out there, this past week, I cut Jason’s shoelace on his custom Jordan cleats. I did it discretely, so when Jason put his cleats on Friday and made his way to the practice field, he leaned down to tighten his shoe, he pulled tight, and. POP! There went his shoelace. They [equipment staff] had to run and get some new shoes for him to wear at practice that day, and at first he thought it was just a random occurrence. Well when he finally looked around and saw an out of the ordinary number of eyes watching and smiling, he knew something was up. He Blamed Chris!!

While I find this story hilarious in general, I think my most favorite part is the end - where hottie Jason Tayler blamed super hottie Chris Cooley for the shoelace incident. Hahahaha. Bravo, Colt! Although I'm sure he got quite the ass kicking when they figured it out.

GO SKINS!!!! I can't believe we gave up the FIRST POINTS DETROIT HAS SCORED ALL YEAR. Embarrassing. Hopefully we'll turn this shit around.

HOOS WIN!! HOOS WIN!! HOOS WIN!!


HOLY.FUCKING.SHIT.

These are the current football standings from the ACC. WE'RE AT THE TOP!!! HOW does a team that loses to DOOK (!!!) beat a ranked team two weeks in a row to end up at the top of their division?!

Today continued the Hoos miracle run. We beat a ranked GT ON THE ROAD!!! At the start of the game, I heard the goons say that #18 GT deserved to be ranked higher than they were. And somehow, we beat them!

I think I'm still in some shock. I'm not quite sure what to make of this, but I think I'm excited as hell.

WAHOOWA!!!!!

Making the day THAT MUCH BETTER - the Vah Tek cHokies lost!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Closing one door... and opening another

Friday was officially my last day with PRS. My Right Fielders publisher asked me how the day had gone, and, for such a simple question, I found it rather loaded.

The day was a whirlwind that was jam packed with various emotions.

1. I was incredibly foggy, as I had been up until all hours of the night both Wednesday and Thursday trying to get two HUGE pages of paperwork done. No sleep + stress + 23082304324 things to do = a very weird, surreal foggy feeling that's a little hard to describe.

2. I felt really crazed and frantic all day. I had three clients that I was seeing and saying good-bye to; I had paperwork I had to finish before leaving the house (sometime in the middle of the night, I had lost power and was forced to go to bed with unfinished work); I had to get my fingerprints done for Arlington County, drop them off with HR, and drop off my direct deposit, tax forms, etc etc etc with .... a different group of HR people in a different building (ok... so I don't really know who I gave it to, but it was in a different building, making it three separate places that I had to visit); I had to drop off my laptop and cell phone at the Falls Church office; I had to drop off some signed forms and a referral with Nova at the Mt. Vernon office; I had to do my exit interview over the phone with Natalie from HR, which took longer than I thought it would; I had to do my time sheet, mileage, and last three weeklies; I had to send the "bye, I'll miss yall" email to everyone before I got booted out of the system; and I had to make sure all loose ends were tied up, and all pertinent information was relayed to whoever needed to know it.

3. I felt excited knowing this was the last batch of paperwork I would have to do!! Yes yes.... I know my new job has paperwork - and probably a shit ton more than this job did, but I won't have to sit at home to do it, which makes it totally different and way better. I'll have a DESK and I'll get to finish it up there and not have to think about it when I get home : ) I was also excited at the big professional step I know I'm about to take. While the pay is... barely more... for a job that basically has me taking on the role of two people for twice as many clients.... it's a HUGE step up professionally, which is fantastic! I also really like everyone at the Clarendon House, and every time I'm there, sooooo many of the clients say hi to me and call me by name, which makes a girl feel good : ) Admittedly, I have no clue how most of them know my name, and I have no idea who they are, but still. And I guess I'll have plenty of time to get to know them soon enough.

4. I felt a little nervous/anxious at the idea of starting a new job as someone who is above the position I'd been in for 2.5+ years. With this job, shit happens... almost constantly... that I totally can't control and really can't do much about. The standard response was "tell so-and-so's case manager," and it came with the implied attitude of "...and let them deal with it." Well, now I am the case manager, which means I have to deal with it. YIKES. Typical thoughts have been running through my head, like "OMG am I even qualified for this??!" (SHHHHHH! don't tell my new boss). Then I remember that I had that thought all the time over the past 2.5+ years (SHHHHHH! don't tell my old boss), and I somehow managed to survive, as did all of my clients. There were some bumps along the way, but in the end, everyone was fine - some even ended up better than they were when I met them. Imagine that! That also makes me realize that I have done a lot of case management, and, more importantly, given the nature of my job and that I'm out in the community separated from my supervisor all day, I've had to make a lot of split second clinical decisions and judgements all by myself. While I always spoke with my supervisor about what had happened, I'd pretty much always made the right decision. All by myself! The nervous/anxious feeling also has to do with the fact that I don't like new things, and I don't like change. At all. This is a big change, and it puts me in Arlington, which I don't know (or like) very well. Don't get me wrong - Arlington has a LOT of good qualities and it has a lot to offer. But I HATE having to navigate my way through it - especially the "down town" area. Too many one way streets, and THERE'S NO WHERE TO PARK. Grrrrr. This will be an... experience.

5. I felt so incredibly beyond sad. I haven't been this sad to leave something since I finished up my degree at UVA and they told me I had to go away. I seriously LOVED the people I worked with. Our CEO somehow knew who I was from day 1 (even though I was never in the office), and she always said hi and called me by name, and would take a few minutes out to talk about UVA with me, which always made me feel like I mattered. She also knew I would ALWAYS want the baseball tickets we sometimes got ; ) Whenever she was around clinical staff, she always took a minute to let us know what a great job we all did, and how our awesome clinical work not only directly impacted our clients, but did good things for the company as a whole (we were pretty respected in the community and beyond for our hard work). On Thursday at my homebased meeting, I was surprised with PINK! roses (yeah... they were a treat to get home... in traffic... but that's ok) and a card signed by a ton of people (and a gift card, which was HOTT, but I'm focusing on sentiment here...). I was reading the card at a stoplight, and I almost started crying (lame, I know... but I'm a crier... you should know that by now)... which almost resulted in an accident. And my clients. I learned that I really, REALLY like all of them. It was so sad to have to say good-bye to them. Coworkers I can more easily keep in touch with, but clients... it really was good-bye. My last client of the day said some of the sweetest things to me during our visit. Almost made me cry (but I held it together), and made me SO HAPPY that I had ended the day with him, so I could leave on that wonderful note.

So here I am, kinda waaaaah after thinking about all of this. I'm excited that Monday I get to start my new job!! but sad I won't see all my usual Monday clients (haha... and sad I'll be spending the day in an orientation). Tuesday will bring another orientation/training in the morning, but then I get to go to Clarendon House AND SIT AT MY NEW DESK!! and do whatever one would do on their first day acting as a case manager.

Can't wait!! : )

Right Fielders

my latest posts.....

David Duchovny is suing mad. First, his tennis ho says she won't comment on their relationship. Now, she says there is no relationship. Pick one, lady. He's suing the Daily Mail for printing tennis ho's original story.

ARod selling apartment. So he can move closer to Madonna and have babies with her?

Plaxico Burress fined by NFL. Haha... I totally heart his name. He was fined for mouthing off during the game. and then again after the game. good job!

Tom Brady has more surgery for infection. Staph? Not staph? Should he have used the docs the team wanted him to rather than the doc Gis insisted on? (Cuz... ya know... she's got all that sports medicine experience....)

Lots of positive drug tests for steroids in the NFL. Everyone is saying they didn't know the diet pill had a banned substance. but... my question is, why are NFL players taking diet pills? to mask other things? until I hear a good explanation for this, I'm gonna stick with this theory. other suggestions/ideas welcome.

Santonio Holmes was arrested. For hot boxing his car. Genius!

Kid gets suspended for Rayhawk. How RETARDED is that?! and how totally cute is this story!!!

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Today's sports posts

Because I know you're dying to read them :-P

Faith Hill on the cover of Shape. Damn.

Tom Brady getting married? Yeah... we've heard this one before....

Kellen Winslow suspended for a week. I just watched the video of his comments back when he played for Miami. What a MASSIVE GIANT ASSHOLE.

Jessica Simpson opened her big mouth about Tony Romo. Again. She's done this about all her relationships, and they've all ended. You think she'd learn to STFU.

Some guy married a fruit

Yeah. This German pop star named Ramma Damma married a pineapple 38 years ago.

Um. W.T.F. There are so many things wrong with that statement.

First... Ramma Damma?! What kind of fucked up name is that?!

Second - HE MARRIED A PINEAPPLE. How is that even possible?!

In the words of hott slut Michael K: he decided one day to marry a fruit. Instead of calling up Elton John, he bought one of the most expensive pineapples, named her Tippi and then drove her across the Scottish border where they were married.

Hahahaha. No one could possibly say it better than that.

Ramma Damma, the German freako fruit-loving nutcase, said "I loved her. I wanted to marry her. We stayed in Gretna Green Hall Hotel and we were married by a craftsman wearing a kilt. We enjoyed meals out. We would go to restaurants and she would enjoy a glass of water over dinner. Tippi loved to go to the movies – especially ones about earthquakes – and she would sit on my lap when she got scared."

Tippi obviously didn't survive long, given she's a fruit and, ya know, prone to rotting. To honor her memory, Ramma Damma runs the only plant sanctuary in Germany. The only one?! Really?! SHOCKING.

I, like Michael K, am wondering if Ramma Damma ever consumated this marriage. I wonder what that was like. I feel like sex with a pineapple could potentially be dangerous. He maybe should have picked a less spikey fruit. But that's just my opinion.

More sports posts

Here are my latest stories....

Are ARod and Madonna having a baby?! INSANITY! I'm loving every minute of her divorce : )

Venus Williams won something. Yeah - BARF. but it is a women in sports page, so I had to do it. please know that it almost killed me.

Reggie Bush injured! which means he's not hopping the pond with his team and playing the Chargers in London. Wait... why are the Saints and Chargers playing in London?

Pacman Jones in rehab. Yeah... what a giant mess and waste of talent he is. and there's nothing worse than wasted talent.

Happy reading!!

Monday, October 20, 2008

Inebriated Erin strikes again!

Part of a conversation I had with Inebriated Erin on a MONDAY NIGHT. I left it in "Inebriated Erin Speak" so you could fully appreciate it in all its glory, however I provided translations for those of you not skilled in her language.

Enjoy!

Inebriated Erin: omg i just fell in my closet and rupped down a rack fo closth [omg i just fell in my closet and ripped down a rack of clothes]
Inebriated Erin: ok i need to go to bned [ok i need to go to bed]
Inebriated Erin: and my boob poped outta my shirt
Inebriated Erin: durong the fall [during the fall]
Inebriated Erin: ps i lost my shirt in the closet incident
Inebriated Erin: so i dont kn wo if im rational [so i don't know if i'm rational]
Inebriated Erin: oh im nude from the waist up rihht now [oh i'm nude from the waist up right now]
Inebriated Erin: hahha
Inebriated Erin: except for teh hot scarrfff [except for the hot scarf - i'm not sure what she is talking about here]
Inebriated Erin: hahhhaHAHAHAH
Inebriated Erin: MAND MY BEDTIME WAS LIKE 4905U HOURS AGO [and my bedtime was a long time ago]
Inebriated Erin: WHAEBE [um.... i dunno what this was supposed to be]
Inebriated Erin: IF SOMEONE RBINGS ME SOMETHIH TO SOMKE ITS OK [if someone brings me something to smoke its ok - she really wanted a cigar]
Inebriated Erin: my boob just hit me in the face
Inebriated Erin: wat im not sure im wearinh any cloths right now [what i'm not sure i'm wearing any clothes right now]
Inebriated Erin: i may be naked
Erika: allllllllllllllllllllllllllllll this is going on my page
Erika: youre gonna hate it in the morning
Inebriated Erin: hhahah i know im gonna need some crack to soffen te blow [hahaha i know i'm gonna need some crack to soften the blow]
Inebriated Erin: got any?
Inebriated Erin: who wnats to drive me to taco bell [who wants to drive me to taco bell]
Erika: hahaha
Erika: call chris
Inebriated Erin: hhhaaaah i whould....ol say drive me to taco bell u can touh=ch a boob [hahahaha i should... say drive me to taco bell you can touch a boob]
Inebriated Erin: hahhhhhhhhahh
Inebriated Erin: aigt well i shoudl o to bed while i see 2 of evething insatad of 4 [aight well i should go to bed while i see 2 of everything instead of 4]
Inebriated Erin: ps i,m nuede on the baclonhy instead and its nootttt warm [ps, i'm nude on teh balcony instead and its not warm]

Gotta Love Chris Cooley!!

I was making my daily rounds of the hottness that I read, and I came across this gem from Chris Cooley. It was so awesome I had to share : )

Big game this week for the Skins
We hit the Browns in the chin
The game was rough
But, we were tough
And left the field with a win.

Clinton ran wild again
Santana scored with a spin
Z made good calls
Edwards dropped balls
Snyder now has a big grin.

I wanted to catch more balls
Instead I blocked like a wall
So sore my neck,
Like a car wreck
But, winning is worth it all.

Our defense gave them some lumps
Fans got everyone so pumped
On the goal line,
Stuffed four times
Cleveland went home in the dumps.

Next week we fly to Detroit
Lions will try to exploit
We'll practice hard,
Go into their yard
Hail to the Skins in Detroit.

Again, HAIL TO THE REDSKINS!! Hopefully we can roll through Detroit this weekend! : )

Harder than I thought...

And so begins my last week with my job. : (

Not only is it sad, it's also incredibly stressful, as I have to make sure all my paperwork is done by Friday, and I have to get everything situated at my new job. I took last Friday off to do that, but I had a horrible migraine all day and didn't make it out of the house. So it's just more crap to deal with this week.

Then there's the long list of stuff I want to write about here, which I feel the need to incorporate, as I find writing - about anything - a little therapeutic. Then there's the stuff I have to write for Right Fielders. And yes, I have to do that, because if I keep them happy they'll eventually pay me.

So here I am, Monday, 9:10, and about to walk out the door for my last Monday with PRS. Very, very sad.

Sunday, October 19, 2008

SUCK IT, BOSTON!

HAHAHAHAHA!!!

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY TAMPA BAY!!!!!!!

I'm not going to lie... I'm WAY more excited over a Red Sox loss than anything else, but this is Tampa's first world series appearance EVER! How exciting for them! : )

AND BOSTON LOST! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I LOVE how they show the dejected looks in the dugout. LOVES IT!

YAY TAMPA! Thanks for making my weekend!! : )

Just so ya know....

Like I said in an earlier post, part of the reason I've been a little MIA is because I've been writing stuff for Right Fielders. Since I'm not the only one writing for them, I thought I'd share some links to the stories I've written... cuz I know yall are dying to read them :-P

Posh and Becks robbed!! BY EMPLOYEES THEY'VE HAD FOR 10 YRS!! How sucky would that be?!

Kellen Winslow had huge, huge balls. So he went to the hospital. Or at least that's the rumor. HA!

The NBA is firing people. Damn, that sucks.

More drug problems for Jose Canseco. Will he ever learn?

Tom Brady says no to CK undie ads. I know - I'm just as devastated as you are. I think that's very mean and selfish of him. I wonder if this means he knows he can't fill out those skivees as well as Becks does. If that's the case, I feel bad for Gis.

Pacman Jones suspended. Again. Idiot.

Posh and Becks bird shit facials. You can't make this stuff up, people.

Ron Mexico the dog killer may return to the NFL. I'll probably do my own post on this, as I had to censor myself for them. I threw up about 2034234324023984023 times in my mouth as I was writing this. I think I need to vent. So stay tuned.

Romo may play injured. Haha... I guess this didn't pan out.

Becks is writing a book. Is there anything he isn't doing these days??

No surgery for Kim Kardashian. Because this is somehow important.

Andy Roddick Naked!!! I know I wrote about this here, too, but it was too good not to share again : )

ARod may be doing Madonna. OOOOOH the scandal!

So there they all are! I've been busy : ) I'll try to post links in a more timely manner in the future.

Sports Update

I know I know... when have I ever been this quiet over a heavy sports weekend? I think I'm sick : ( All weekend, I've taken a ton of naps and still felt really crappy and tired... I'm a bit worried. Not good.

All that being said....

WAHOOWA!!! I'm not going to lie - I fell asleep before the end of the game (see? I MUST be sick!)... and in my asleep haze, I thought we had lost. Imagine my surprise when, at the start of the tek game, the goons talk about UNC losing! VERY EXCITING! GO HOOS, baby!! I dunno where this team came from, but I'm happy it finally showed up, even if it was a few games late : )

HAIL TO THE REDSKINS!! Again, not going to lie... I slept through the beginning ... and the middle of the second half. But I saw the end - YAY!!! Glad my boys pulled out the win! : ) We best look better against Detroit, though. I can't handle these close games to sucky teams.

YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY BC!!!!!!!! I did manage to watch (although not pay full attention to) most of that game, and I was VERY pleasantly surprised by the outcome! I have to say, I wasn't totally shocked BC won. Lulu went up to Boston for the game, and, other than a UVA game, I don't think Lulu has ever traveled to a big game and seen a win. I know he went to the ACC title game that they lost. And I think he's been to a bowl game... that they lost. I think there maybe be more.... but Lulu's not around to verify this information. It appears his streak continued, though! so big YAY! there!!! Thanks, Lulu : )

Now, if only Tampa Bay can pull out a win over the Red Sox!! GO RAYS!!!!

Saturday, October 18, 2008

I knew it was too good to be true

This is what I get for being excited about the damn game. NOT A GOOD START, BOYS.

Things didn't start great against ECU, either. So maybe it's still ok

I DON'T want to lose to a team who hasn't beaten us in Charlottesville since 1981. KEEP THE STREAK ALIVE!

Oldest Rivalry in the South!

What's the present tense of Carolina Blue?

CAROLINA BLOWS!

Today marks the 113th meeting of UVA and UNC, making it the oldest rivalry in the South. Despite UNC's #18 ranking, history points towards a W for the 'Hoos.

  • UNC has not won in Charlottesville since 1981.
  • Clint Sintim leads the NATION in sacks by a linebacker, racking up 8 so far this season (!!!!)
  • Cedric Peerman has had back-to-back 100 yd games
  • Carolina BLOWS! (I know this is a repeated point, but I felt it was worth mentioning again)

I'm actually a little excited about today's game! I feel that's going to come back and bite me in the ass, since the last two weeks I was resigned to a loss before the game started, and I have been pleasantly surprised. This week, our foe is ranked - although, I guess tek is ranked as well, which I find completely ridiculous and feel they don't remotely deserve. So perhaps a little number before their name really doesn't mean shit.

GO HOOS!!!!

I got all my little tidbits of knowledge from my boy TheUVAFool. Check him out : )

Friday, October 17, 2008

Oprah Gyno Story

I was watching Mamma O the other day, and she had a show about rude behavior. At one point, an audience member stood up and told her story about one of the rudest things she had ever personally experienced. This story was so traumatizing, it still haunts me several days later.


The lady said she was at the gynecologist (and we all know how completely traumatizing I find that experience...). She had her feet in the stirrups and she was spread out in all her glory (HORRIFYING). A cell phone rings and the lady realized it wasn't hers. It was the doctor's. AND HE ANSWERED IT and had what she described as a 7 minute conversation that was NOT an emergency. He had a cell phone conversation while she's in a glorified paper sheet with her vajayjay all spread out in this guy's face.

O.M.G.

Needless to say, she has never gone back to this particular doctor.

a little MIA

So I feel I've been a little MIA recently. I have 20384203852352343 things saved away to write about, but I haven't really had a chance to do anything. I've been busy. Sorry.

I'm currently in the process of switching jobs, which is both sad and exciting. I love my job and my clients, and it's been harder than expected telling them all that I'm leaving. Thankfully, I've gotten through breaking the news to everyone, and now I can focus on transitioning them to their new people and making sure they'll all be taken care of.

On Oct. 27th, I start my new job as case manager at the Clarendon Club House in Arlington!! This job combines what I do now with the job of a case manager - basically, I'll be doing the job of 2 people. And I'll be doing that with twice as many clients. Haha... the more I think about it, the more I question wtf I've gotten myself into. Haha... but that's ok! Still excited!! (I think...)

Tomorrow I get to spend a few hours filling out paperwork and getting fingerprinted (again). Fun fun! I hope I don't have to get a TB test. We all know I'm a huge freak with 20385235023482343 different phobias, and needles are at the top of the list. I don't know if I can handle a TB test. So here's hoping!

In the midst of all this chaos, I've started a sort of 2nd job. I'm an affiliate writer for Right Fielders, which is a blog about women in sports, off-field sports news, and the hottie girlfriends and wives of athletes. All my posts are labeled as mine - and, obvi, they're the best :-P Check it out! Hopefully I'll get promoted to a staff writer and actually get paid for my efforts.

That's the quickie update on my life... hopefully I'll find some time tomorrow to write about one or two of those 20384203852352343 stockpiled stories : )

Thursday, October 16, 2008

More awesomeness from Lusty Lulu!

Lusty Lulu: gotta take my ambien
Erika: you take ambien?
Lusty Lulu: no, doing something else i do every night before bed
Lusty Lulu: but ambien sounds better, doesnt it?

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Gotta love out-of-context quotes

Snippit from an IM conversation with Lusty Lulu (real name, Brian)

LustyLulu: brian has syphillis

When Celebrity Fashion Goes Horribly Wrong

Here's a Fierce! fashion edition of celebrity news... because this stuff was just too good to pass up.


Madonna's so busted, she gets two mentions in this same post. Sad for her. First, these shoes. WTF was she thinking?! She rocked these Chanel shoes at the New York premier of her film "Filth and Wisdom." First - Chanel?! CHANEL made these?! When I think "Chanel," I think nice things like "timeless" and "classic," not "gangster toy guns." These things look like some horrible reject from the Maddox shoe line. Not to mention, the guns themselves look busted as hell. Like Maddox was running around playing with them for about a year, then got tired of them and threw them out in order to play with the new knife Angie and Brad just bought him. Chanel rooted through Brangelina's trash and snapped these puppies right up. So they're not even clean fugly shoes! What kind of statement was she trying to make here? I don't get it.

Moving on.... let's talk about her HAIR. This is something that bothers the shit out of me everywhere she goes. Here she is, all done-up in her weird ass expensive Chanel shoes and fancy dress for her own movie premier, and she couldn't even be bothered to dye her fucking roots?! COME ON. You have more money that God, Madge. FIX YOUR FUCKING HAIR. This is an issue EVERYWHERE she goes. Her big benefit for Malawi? ROOTS. Her 50th birthday party? ROOTS. All over her concerts? ROOTS. Premier for Guy's last movie? ROOTS. I don't get why this is so difficult for her. If you can't keep up with it, then don't dye it. You'd think her people would be more on top of this.


Another lucky lady with a double-mention! Because yes, it's just that tragic. Here she is looking like a bargain basement ho at Madonna's movie premier. Her hair looks trashtastic (and oddly just like Madonna's), but at least it's all the same color. Her face isn't looking... right... either. It's like... all dirty or something. I just want to scrub it with a brillo pad. But let's talk about the real tragedy here. Why WHY are her feet a totally different color from the rest of her body?! How could this have possibly happened?! We all know that shade of orange isn't natural, so someone did this to her. HAHAHAHAHAHA to them for 1. thinking of this and 2. actually getting away with it. The vajayjay lovin must be blocking what little good sense she has left.

I think what makes this better is she was photographed somewhere else with her multi-colored skin. Perez posted this picture the other day, which is clearly from a different event, as she's looking tragic in a totally different outfit. Haha... different outfit, but same shoes. I really don't like the checkered top on this thing. Or the one shoulder look. And it almost looks like her hands are white, too. Homegirl needs a new tanning company. Stat 1 2.
And, at both of these events, where was her accessory du jour, SamRo?! Does she skip out on things she has to shower before attending?


Hot.Tranny.Mess. That's really all that comes to mind when I see this picture. So much is wrong. First, her hair. I hate that haircut. Although, again, at least it's all one color (HELLO, Madonna!). The make-up. WOW. That lipstick is just criminal. Then the shirt. It's like a bad acid trip. And the leather pants. Never a fan of leather pants. And top the whole thing off with purple tranny-inspired platforms! FIRED. She needs new gays around her, because it's shameful they let her out the door looking like this.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Long Overdue Celebrity Roundup

It's been a while, and I have 2083402394234234 stories stock piled... so here's the rundown!


Amy Winehouse and Tom Cruise

Tommy girl and the Scientology aliens have contacted Wino, stating they would like to help. Apparently, Xenu can cure all! They have a three part plan to fix her crack headed ways. Part 1 consists of vitamins. Part 2 is some kind of "detox diet" and some sort of special sauna thing. Part 3 is a series of Scientology self-help books. Some source told The Mirror “They told her they wanted to help her beat drugs and could tailor-make a program so she wouldn’t have to go to a residential center. She liked that idea because her husband Blake is out of prison soon and wouldn’t want to be away from him when he’s finally freed.” Too bad you have to sell your soul to the crazies to get any kind of help. Maybe you could just do the vitamins, detox diet, and saunas and then peace out before getting to the alien workbooks? Yeah, probably not. By that point, I'm sure they've reprogrammed your soul. On a side note, HOW GOOD DOES SHE LOOK IN THIS PICTURE?! She actually looks her age! So young and full of life. Let this be a lesson, yall - drugs are bad. BAD! They apparently can lead to Xenu, and nothing is worse than that.

Jennifer Aniston

Let me start off by saying I find Jennifer awfully sad these days. I feel she's rather desperate for attention. I was totally on team Aniston (and technically still am) after Brad left to be with that home wrecker of his, but every time Jennifer lands herself in the rags with some "new man" story (with all the accompanying "sources" that talk about how in loooooooove she is after 2 hrs), or, worse, stories like this one, I'm sure Angie privately smiles to herself. That being said, Jenny's recently been in the rags for various things. The story linked above talks about the obscene money she spends on her dog. Don't get my wrong - I love my dog more than anything, even though it's questionable if he deserves it or not. However, I think this story borders on the insane. She spends $350 a WEEK to give her dog Norman massages, Reiki (some kind of touch-oriented Japanese stress-reduction technique), and acupuncture to help him with aching joints and stiffness. $350 A WEEK. That's INSANE. And a clear indication she has way too much money on her hands. In other Jennifer news (not linked above), she's apparently freakishly tanorexic. Recently, her own personal tanning bed broke, SO SHE BOUGHT TWO to replace it. And, in today's news, she's apparently back with John Mayer. He's supposedly been sending her millions of sappy lovey text messages, and she finally succumbed and spent time with him in New York eating sushi at his place and going out to eat and whatnot. I'm sure in two days, the stories will be about them getting married and having kids, and two days after that, they'll be done. Because that's her track record recently.

Speaking of Angie and Brad...

At her recent movie premier, she was asked if they were done having kids. DUH. The answer was "no." On having 203820394234 kids, she said "We often try to have a bath alone together at the end of the night and sit and talk, but they hear the water and want to jump in. It's fun and it's lovely - the thing about having six kids is once you've passed three or four it's so crazy anyway that it's just more chaos and it's all OK." On the twins, she said "The twins are just the sweetest little things. They lay next to each other. They're starting to smile a lot. Knox looks like Brad and Vivienne looks more like me. They are developing interesting personalities. Knox seems more relaxed and Vivienne is more loud." In other news, they sure do move around a lot. In just the past week or so.... they dragged all of those kids from France to New York for Angie's premier, then to New Orleans for a hott five minutes, then back to their huge estate in France, THEN to a huge fortress in Berlin while Brad films his latest movie. How can all this moving be good for these kids? Some of them are school aged - remember allllllllllllll that hoopla when Maddox was enrolled at that ridic overpriced school with the even more ridic lunches in New York? Thank God they keep adding to the family - the kids won't have any friends outside of the clan with all the moving they do. I feel like, at this point, it's time to settle somewhere and give the kids a small taste of NORMALCY. I realize as part of the Brangelina clan, "normal" can't totally happen, but you can get somewhat close. But that's just my opinion.....

Halle Berry

Recently voted the sexiest woman alive (or something close to that) by Esquire, she's still with that hott model of hers and she told UsWeekly that they're trying to have another baby. This picture of her was taken at an Elle Magazine party, and I'm thinking she looks like she's been successful at getting herself knocked up again. I always hate to speculate on stuff like this - I mean, what if it was just an off night? or maybe it's that time of the month and she's a bit bloated. But it's hard to argue with this picture.... if so, congrats to them! I do wish they'd get married, but I guess I'm just a little old fashioned like that.

David Duchovny

Fox Moulder has been sprung from sex rehab! He was spotted out and about with that horrible wife of his about a week ago. I say she's horrible because I'm still upset that he married her rather than wait for me. I had such a thing for him back in the day.... but I digress....


Johnny Depp

First, let me start off by saying YUM. Ok.... moving on. Johnny is reportedly getting $55.8 million UPFRONT to come back as Capt. Jack Sparrow for part 4 of Disney's Pirates of the Caribbean movies. That's a shit ton of cash! And that's just the upfront payment - who knows how much he'll end up making when you factor in all the other shit that gets put into movie contracts. DAMN. This payment puts Johnny at the top of the leader board for upfront movie payments. The previous record holder was Tom Hanks, who got $50 million upfront for part 2 of the Da Vinci Code. Where have I been?! I thought the kings and queens of hollywood got $20 million a movie if they were super hott shit. Guess I'm living in the distant past. Congrats to Johnny for his huge ass payday.

Andy Roddick

Again, YUM. To help Elton John raise money to help those with AIDS in the South, this hott piece auctioned off the chance to get an hour-long private tennis lesson taught by him. During the auction, he upped the ante to an hour-long lesson in which he promised to take off his shirt. With the increase in bids, he then one upped that and stated he would teach the lesson NAKED. Some lady paid $15,000 for the opportunity to spend an hour with his sweaty, naked, hott ass self. Lucky bitch. THIS is why I need to win the lotto.

Jamie Lynn Spears

Ok. This story is getting on my nerves. IS SHE OR ISN'T SHE?! Make up your mind, people! Some "sources" say Jamie Lynn got herself knocked up again, just 3 months-ish after giving birth. Apparently she thought breast feeding was a contraceptive, so she didn't ask baby daddy Casey to wrap it up. Isn't this how Brit Brit had two kids so close together? You'd think she would have learned. You also think she would have learned after getting knocked up the first time. Her awesome mom is flipping out, and family members are pleading with her to get an abortion. Other "sources" state this isn't true and she's not preggo. Every day there seems to be a new "source" that contradicts what was said the day before. I guess we'll know in a few months, though. PS - hott skanky tshirt, Jamie Lynn! Good image for a teenaged mom.

Maureen McCormick

Perfect Marcia was a skeevy ho! Maureen wrote some kind of tell-all book delving into the sordid details of a troubled child star. Her book states she had 2 abortions, was addicted to coke and ludes, would knock boots for drugs, dated Steve Martin and Michael Jackson (!!!!), almost gave her V-card to her tv brother Barry Williams (that's almost gross), had drug binges at the Playboy Mansion, and battled bulima. Damn. That's like Wino and and a half! She dated MICHAEL JACKSON! I guess that was back before he was super creepy, but still! She blames all her issues on Syphilis. Yes, you read that right. On the Today Show, she said that her grandma died in a mental hospital from the Syph, and a week later her grandpa killed himself (sadness). After that, her mom got the Syph. Damn. Talk about a family of hos! Marcia, Marcia, Marcia. Jan must be thrilled.

Hef's New Hos

Yeah. I still think they're pretty fug. Here they are looking trashtastic at some fashion show. I get that they're young, blond, orange hos, and Hef has a thing for young, blond, oranges hos, but SERIOUSLY. I think Karissa and Kristina Shannon are a big step down for the mackdaddy Playboy pimp. He needs to move on already. NEXT.

105 years of pure innocence

This hott piece was mentioned on Elliot in the Morning the other day, and then showed up on dlisted... because she's just that special.

Meet Clara Meadmore, 105 years young and Britain's oldest virgin. Diane from EITM also said she was the world's oldest virgin - I haven't read confirmation of that, but I can't imagine there being too many people who are 1. older than her and 2. still as pure as the day they were born, so I'm going to give Diane the benefit of the doubt on this one.

Clara told The Sun "People have asked whether I am a homosexual and the answer is no. I have just never been interested in or fancied having sex. I've never had a boyfriend - I've never been bothered about relationships. When I was a girl you only had sex with your husband and I never married. I've always had lots of platonic friendships with men but never felt the need to go further than that or marry. I made my mind up at the age of 12 never to marry and I've not gone back on that. I grew up in an era where little girls were to be seen and not heard so I had to learn to stand up for myself and earn my own living. Some men don't like that in a woman and before long I was too old to marry anyway."

I find it interesting that people question which side she butters her bread on. When Diane first told this story, my first thought was of her being a nun or some other kind of religious person like that. It seems religion had nothing to do with her choice to not have sex. She just didn't fancy it.

Good for you, Clara! Sometimes I question if men are worth the trouble..... although, at the same time. 105 yrs of.... nothing. WOW. I know some people who have trouble going 105 hrs without getting busy. You think she's 100% pure, or do you think she had some alone time somewhere in those 105 years? Or maybe if you've never gotten anything, you don't know what you're missing...? Interesting things to ponder. Enjoy the mental picture of a 105 year old getting busy by herself :-P You're welcome for that.

Monday, October 13, 2008

End of a good weekend!

Today, Coop and I went back to Prince William Forest Park to check out one of their trails. What a good time!! Coop had a blast sniffing around, digging in the dirt, and exploring the area, and I was able to take 230481203498234324023852639517234 pictures of the trees and whatnot (which are all up in my main webshots album, if you care : ) so ya know... check them out).

The trail was great - until I got to a part that I didn't think I would be able to navigate my way back down (especially not with Cooper pulling me along). I can't wait to go back in two weeks with Lulu and hopefully make it past where I turned around today! I think I'm going to have to look into getting an annual pass to this place, because aside from this trail, there are several others we still need to explore. AND, it's only about 6 miles from the house! YAY!

Coop is now completely tuckered out, which is fabulous : ) Too bad I have to work tomorrow : ( Big giant BOOOOO to that.

Celebrity Roundup - Bunny Edition

There have been 2038432048234234 stories about this recently... here's the quick round up on what's going on.

Kendra and Hef have broken up. There have been several stories about her dating (being engaged to??!) a football player (a Philly Eagle). She finally confirmed that she and Hef are no longer together, saying that they would always be friends. Awwww.


Holly and Hef have broken up, too. There were all kinds of stories about Holly running around with that nasty Cris Angel guy. She said they were "special friends" or something like that. She finally just recently said that she and Hef have broken up, although they remain friends. She has her own place, but is currently still living in the Mansion (did she get her own room?). Hef finally made a statement as well, saying that Holly wanted kids and marriage, and he couldn't give her those things. Apparently, they did try to have kids a few months ago, but Hef's old self is shooting blanks, and kids just aren't possible. He also said that Holly would always be the love of his life. I have to say - I find this kind of sad. Despite the MASSIVE age difference, I actually liked them together. I'm sad they had to break up, but I guess I'm glad Holly did what she had to do and didn't give up on being a mom and a wife.

No one really knows if Hef and Bridget are still together. She's been in Europe filming "Bridget's Beaches" with the travel channel.

Being the hott pimp that he is, Hef hasn't let these break ups get him down. He's dating Kristina and Karissa Shannon, 19 year old twins who have previously posed for Playboy. I, personally, think they're ugly... and I'm surprised he's gone for the small boob look (since the last three girls were so opposite from that). Could they be any more orange?! Someone(s) need to lay off the self tanner. They also have a sordid past. Not too long ago, they were arrested at some party for laying a serious beat down on a party guest. And I feel like I read somewhere that that wasn't their first arrest for laying a beat down on someone. Classy. It's like Kendra... only much, much worse. And not as good looking.

Some chick named Amy Leigh Andrews, a college senior from Georgia, is also vying hardcore for a coveted "girlfriend" title. From what I've read, Hef says she has a good shot, but I guess he hasn't made up his mind yet. I think she's better looking than the orange twins, but I'm not overly impressed, either. She strikes me as a hardcore gold digger (hahaha... although I guess they all do), and she makes me miss the girls next door.

Photo source for the orange twins; Georgia gold digger.

Sunday, October 12, 2008

That didn't go so well....

HOW could we have lost to the Rams?! THE RAMS?! They hadn't won a game ALL SEASON! W.T.F.

Aside from that (and my panic attack, which I'll get into later...), the day was pretty good! We actually got out the door on time (which is odd for us), and only ran into minor traffic before we got to the Wilson Bridge (which, I must say, I totally don't get....). Upon arrival at FedEx Field, the lot we wanted to park in was full, so we were directed through various lots half way across the stadium to an open one. No biggie : )

A short walk to the stadium later, we were headed to our seats!! We found our way to the escalator and went up... and up... and up.... and up.... and up.......... for what seemed like an eternity. However, I was pleasantly surprised at the view once we got alllllllllllll the way up there. I feel like the seats up there had more room than ones lower in the stadium. I didn't feel like I was on top of whoever I was sitting next to. And, being in the front row, we had a TON of leg room. It was super super comfortable and nice.

The only drawback was the guy I was sitting next to. He defines "trashy." Always smelled like smoke, had a trashy woman with poorly bleached hair on his arm, acid wash jeans (on both of them), and at one point, he took off his shoes and put his feet up and allllllllllllll over the glass in front of us. HOW GROSS IS THAT?! He made the guy from last year with the black hole of an ass (causing the atomic wedgie that had his jeans sucked up into him) seem like a treat. Something was just nasty about this dude all stretched out IN PUBLIC with his socked feet all over this piece of glass. If you want to stretch out, buddy, STAY HOME.

Despite the lovely weather and good seats, the game...... UGH. The game. WTF WAS THAT?! Thinking back over the past few weeks, from Chris Cooley's blog posts, I feel he/the team were more revved up over Dallas and Philly than this game. I guess that makes sense when you look at the opponents, but the outcome is completely unacceptable. And my boy FUMBLED! UGH!

After the game, things took a dramatic turn for the worse. It took us like an HOUR to get out of the fucking parking lot. Driving through all the lots, etc, to get back out, we saw a ton of po, and like 3 ambulances a little ways away from the road in the middle of one of the lots. I dunno if this is what caused the hold up, oooor if it was unrelated shenanigans. Once away from FedEx, it took us another 2.5 hrs to get home. I'm so not making this up. Traffic for MILES and MILES before the Wilson Bridge. We FINALLY cleared that, things were good, then we got on 95 S, and again, gridlocked traffic. NO REASON FOR THIS. I had a panic attack from sitting in the car for that long, which was less than fun.

When we got home, Tx called one of his friends in Texas and said he had a ton of fun at the game, and says he HAS to go to another one. Naturally, I love that determination : ) Hopefully the next one will turn out better.

.... a few pictures from the game are in my main webshots album, if you care : )

HAIL TO THE REDSKINS!!!

It's that time! I'm about to don my Chris Cooley jersey for it's virgin game watching experience, get in the car, and head out to FedEx Field!

SO EXCITED!!!

HAIL TO THE REDSKINS!!!! : )

Now that's dedication....

I hate the Red Sox SO MUCH that I have dreams about how much I hate them. Damn. Talk about dedication to my feelings.

Saturday, October 11, 2008

Watch out, Lulu!!

This story just cracks me up.... mostly because it happened in the city where Lulu lives.

Some guy got really drunk, got on the bus to go home, but got off 8 miles from where he actually lives. He picked a house, walked in through the unlocked front door, ate a crab cake in the kitchen, and crawled into the bed in the master bedroom.

The owners later came home with their 16 year old son. The Mrs. said she knew something wasn't right when she saw the crumbs from the eaten crab cake in the kitchen. The Mr. walked upstairs and flipped on the light in his room, and was shocked to see a white bearded older man snuggled up in his bed. The family quickly left the house and called the police. They had to shake the man to wake him up. When he finally roused, he asked the police what they were doing in his house. (HAHAHA!)

Turns out, this poor man had lost his job 3 weeks earlier. He got blitzed and got confused on the way home and picked a random house to return home to. Once hearing the story, the family decided not to press charges, since nothing really happened (except for the missing crab cake). The Mrs. even packed a nice lunch of ribs and leftover soup for the police to give the poor jobless guy. How sweet.

Pay attention, Lulu! Make sure you keep your door locked - otherwise, this guy may curl up in your bed one night.

The second coming?

This story is crazy!!

Tidbit, a female Atlantic Black Tip Shark at an aquarium in Virginia Beach, produced a baby through divine, immaculate conception! She was raised at the Virginia Aquarium & Marine Science Centre, where she spent eight years with no contact with a male shark of her species. She was removed from her tank for a vet exam, and, sadly, she died : ( They preformed a necropsy, and discovered she had a fully formed pup in her belly, and she was nearly ready to give birth! DNA testing showed the baby had no father and it was indeed created just from Tidbit's genes.

How wild is that?! Apparently this is the second known instance of a Jesus shark. Last year, DNA testing proved that a hammerhead shark living at a zoo in Omaha had given birth to a baby Jesus shark back in 2002. This phenomenon is called parthenogenesis, and it happens when a baby is conceived without a father's sperm fertilizing a mother's egg. In the case of these two virgin shark moms, it appears as if the mother's chromosomes split during egg development. Apparently, this isn't unique to sharks. It has also been documented in Komodo dragons, snakes, birds, fish and amphibians. I knew some frogs could change sex based on their environment, but I had no idea females could just get knocked up absent of knocking boots with a hott buddy animal.

If this happens in sharks with the splitting of chromosomes during egg development, does this mean female sharks develop their eggs as they age? (As opposed to us human girls, who are born with all their eggs already made.) I guess my real question is - is this some sort of freak developmental issue when the fetus girl shark is busy making her eggs (like it would be if this happened to a woman), or was it some kind of evolutionary response to an environment that was absent of any males that could help propagate the species?

I think either answer leads to some interesting things. If the answer is "yes" to the first question (ie, it's a freak thing in the life of a fetus), it technically means it might happen to a person. How FREAKY would that be? Maybe it does happen! but mom's body aborts the baby naturally (aka miscarriage very early on and mom has no idea) because it can tell that this particular baby doesn't have a nice combination of DNA from two sources... ? Or, if the answer to the second question is "yes," that leads to some WAY cool ideas about evolution, survival of the fittest, that deep biological need/urge to make babies, etc!!! The need to propagate the species is SO STRONG that certain fit bodies are able to do it themselves when they can't find a mate. That is soooo freakin awesome!! (You'll have to forgive me... I'm a huge bio nerd, so I get off on stuff like this.)

Interesting story! If I had the energy, I'd probably research this a little more.... perhaps tomorrow night : )

Post Secret at UVA

Yall know I absolutely love Post Secret. They... well, he... recently had an event at UVA. I really wanted to go, but obviously I didn't make it.

Frank mentioned it in this week's post on myspace. I loved the story he told, so I wanted to share it here....

Here is one UVA secret shared this week that I will not forget for a long time. A brave young woman stood up from the balcony and told the crowd of students below that she had grown-up locally in Charlottesville, VA and her dream as a girl was to attend The University of Virginia. But in high school she had had a baby and even though she tried to keep her dream alive it was not to be. Her voice quivered with emotion: Every time I walk on this campus it is bittersweet because I wish so bad I could be a student here like all of you. She went on to remind everyone in attendance how lucky they were to be part of such a special place. When she walked away from the microphone the audience showed her how deeply they appreciated her and her secret.

Reading this almost makes me cry. I absolutely loved being at UVA, and I couldn't imagine some life circumstance taking that away from me. Part of me thinks this girl should have been more responsible, but shit happens. I'm sad her dream (and promising future) was stripped away with what could have just been one little mistake that had one big, crying, pooping outcome. Sad : (

Part one of my awesome weekend

Lulu overslept (as usual), but managed to make it here just after UVA's first touchdown. I've already shared how awesome the game was, but no harm in mentioning our 35-20 win over ECU again!!

While we were watching the game, we decided to order some pizza (since Lulu wouldn't be making us waffles or pancake puffs : ( boo). This shouldn't have been a difficult task, however it ended up taking like 1.5-2 hrs to get our complete order. I totally don't understand what was so difficult about delivering a pizza and some soda, but what do I know? After about an hour, we called asking where our order was. We heard whoever answered the phone yell to someone in the background to actually bring us our food and "hurry the fuck up." He gets here a few minutes later and hands us things we totally didn't order. He happened to have our pizza in the car, but not our drinks. While we ate are barely lukewarm meal, we waited for the beverages to arrive. After calling TWICE, they finally showed up. Ugh.

After the game and the lunch fiasco, the original plans called for Lulu and I to take Coop off to the park and enjoy the beautiful day. However, Lulu the big DORK had to leave : ( So I dragged Texas there instead and we spent a little while exploring one of the picnic areas of this HUGE park. We then drove around and found the start to one of their many trails (I think they have like 35 miles of hiking trails), so I definitely plan on bringing Coop back on Monday to do some exploring : ) Most of the park is still green, but I did find a few trees that have embraced fall early, which made me and my camera very happy : )

Now I'm here with a very tired puppy, just chillaxing waiting for the Skins game tomorrow! YAY!!

In case yall were wondering....

This is my new hair cut.... after I hacked at it myself with cuticle scissors. Twice. (hahaha... never wrote that I did it a 2nd time. once just wasn't enough.)

Still not sure how I feel about it, but here it is in all its glory. I messed with it forever this morning after my shower, and it always seems to look the same no matter what I do. I think I'm still really unhappy with the layers (which you can't really see in the picture...). I dunno what this tool was thinking when he cut them... but this morning I felt like some bad 80s reject. And we all know how much I loathe 1980s fashion. So yeah, not really digging feeling like a reject from that decade.

Guess I'm stuck with it until everything grows out some. Then I'll be stuck trying to find a new person to do a better job cutting it. Fun.

WAHOOWA!!!!!

Against all odds, WE WON ANOTHER FOOTBALL GAME!!!!

And, what's better than a Hoos win? BEATING A TEAM THAT VAH TEK LOST TO!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I love it. Lulu was here, and he wasn't exactly thrilled, which made it so.much.better.

GO HOOS!!!

YAY!

WHOLE NEW GAME, BABY!!! Aight, Cedric!

In the words of Ashley - How do you spell touchdown? TD!!!

thank God for our D

Thank God at least half our team showed up today. Two INTs, and we're only down 6-0. I guess it could be worse.

Our good kick return just got called back because of a block in the back. Damnit. I don't get why this is so hard - IF YOU CAN READ HIS NAME, YOU CAN'T HIT HIM. Seems simple enough to me.

It's Game Day!!

I wish I was excited as that title sounds. But I'm not. Coming off of a twerp crushing, I feel I should be a little more optimistic, but years of being a Hoo fan has taught me otherwise (sad but true).

East Carolina just scored off a turn over. Boo. The good news? We held them to a field goal, so I guess that's something. This seems like a bad start, though, as we didn't have any turn overs last week, yet throw an INT on our opening drive in this game. Yikes.

Lulu's coming over, and I'm not going to lie. It would make my LIFE if we could beat a team that the chokies couldn't. ECU is favored by 6-6.5 points, depending on what you look at. Better than the spread against the twerps, but still.

Here's hoping!

PS - they just showed a picture of the lawn! The tree was all pretty and turning fall-like. One of my favorite times at UVA. I miss it : (

PPS - O.M.G. Our QB just got smacked in the face by the football because he wasn't ready for the hike. WTF. We're lucky that wasn't a turn over. Thank God Lulu isn't here yet.

Crap

Lulu has been complaining all week (in a very girly way) that there are mice in his house. In theory, mice really don't bother me, so every time he's mentioned this, my first thought has been "awww... mice are kind of cute! as long as it's not a rat...."

But then I quickly remember the mouse problem I had in my very first apartment. Jessi was over one night and we were watching tv. She suddenly pointed to the corner and screamed MOUSE. I looked in the general direction her finger was pointing, and saw this brown blur streaking across the living room. Needless to say, I completely FREAKED OUT. We started screaming and we climbed up onto the dining room table because we figured the mouse couldn't scale the metal table legs. Stepping only on chairs, I made my way over to the telephone by the kitchen and started calling people.

My first call was to my landlord, who told me they would call someone, but it would be at my expense. I got rageful and hung up on them. So I started calling some of my boyfriend's frat brothers and any other guys I could think of. Bible Dave come over and grabbed a frying pan. I told him he wasn't allowed to hurt the mouse (1. because I didn't want him to and 2. I didn't want squished mouse on my frying pan), so he put down the pan and grabbed a box top. He was able to get the mouse into the box top, but wasn't able to keep him there, since there was no lid or anything to contain him. Bible Dave eventually gave up and left. And yes, Jessi and I were still standing on the dining room table. Charles and GW came over next, but they figured they couldn't really do anything, and they quickly left. Eventually, I called my roommate, who happened to be at Walmart with her mom. She picked up some stuff and we eventually got the problem taken care of.

It seems Lulu has somehow transferred his mouse problem to me. I was down in the scary part of the basement this morning doing laundry. Coop was poking around and was way too interested in something in the scary dark room/drug selling room/whatev this area used to be. When he came out, he was carrying one of the Orkin glue traps that the technician had left forever ago. He immediately dropped it, but remained interested. I looked down and saw this black thing sticking out of it and was HORRIFIED when I saw THE BLACK THING MOVE. I FLIPPED out because I had no idea what it was and it was MOVING. Texas acted like an ass and wouldn't go down there to look, so I had to get brave and go face whatever the black moving thing was. The glue trap was nowhere near where I had last seen it - how scary is that? Sticking out of one end, I saw a little black mouse. It's only stuck by its tail, so it's free to pull that trap all over the place. I needed to get my laundry out, and the damn thing had moved way too close to the washer and dryer, so I found a pole and pushed it far away. Naturally, though, I'm wondering how many more of these guys there are in my basement, and I'm not thrilled that my laundry isn't done yet.

I called Orkin, and I have to wait until Tuesday (!!!) to get a call back from my local office (DAMN YOU, COLUMBUS!) Texas continues to be an ass, so I called Bill to come take care of this mouse. He said he'd be over sometime during my football game. I stuck a laundry basket on top of the glue trap to keep it contained. I also had to call the vet, cuz Coop touched this thing and I'm beyond paranoid, so I'm scared he's got some weird mouse disease. They said he should be fine, but gave me like 20384234324 different things to watch out for.

Adding this to the list, I've now found spiders, cicadas, other funky unidentified bugs, a lizard, and a mouse in my house. I'm beginning to think living so close to a wooded area isn't a good thing.

Don't fuck with Maverna

52 yr old Maverna Turay, from the Tampa Bay area, suspected that her husband was having an affair. So what did she do? Poured a pot of boiling hot water on his groin. Duh.

She's being charged with aggravated domestic battery for pouring the scalding water on her husband while he slept. He's currently in fair condition in the burn unit of the local hospital. Maverna told the po she had been getting her drink on prior to the incident.

My biggest question hasn't been answered - was he cheating?! How anyone could cheat on such a fine lady is beyond me. I'm dying to know what he was doing to lead her to the conclusion that he was messing around on her.

I have to say, this is one of the greatest mug shots of all time. It's like she's proud. Or doesn't give a shit. Or still really, really drunk. You choose.

Words can't even describe how gross this is

This story is almost too gross to be real. But it is. Wow.

The China Daily reports that used condoms are being recycled into hair ties and rubber bands in the South China area of Pearl River Delta. Yes. You read that right. USED condoms. USED. And they're popular! Cheap and colorful, baby!

The problem - "There are a lot of bacteria and viruses on the rubber bands and hair ties made from used condoms," a dermatologist at the Guangzhou Hospital of Armed Police, who asked to be identified by his surname Dong, told the local paper. "People could be infected with AIDS, warts or other diseases if they hold the rubber bands or strings in their mouths while weaving their hair into plaits or buns."

Yeah, because they're USED CONDOMS. EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWAH.

Something is very, very wrong with this.

Hott slut Michael K posted this lovely video the other day.



There's so much wrong with this, I don't even know where to begin. I think the worst part is the way the baby responds to daddy's tickling. I've always thought that dolls that pee are weird, but this is just completely whack. Who came up with this thing? And what perv thought this commercial was a good idea?!

Friday, October 10, 2008

TV Timeout - Project Runway

This week's episode of Project Runway is always one of my favorites. I love when Tim goes to visit everyone. You get a small peek at their runway collections, and you get to learn more about each designer and see a little window into their lives.

This week didn't disappoint.... although some of the fashions did. Yes, I hate Kenley. But based on this week's runway (and the little bit of her collection that Tim showed us), she definitely deserved to move on. Don't get me wrong, however - it'll kill me if she wins. I also felt Leanne did a good job as well, although I'm a little concerned that next week the judges are going to think her collection is too much of the same from one piece to another. I'm hopeful, though, and I can't wait to see everything she made. I thought her wedding and bridesmaid dresses were great!

Korto was my favorite in terms of seeing into her home life. I think her daughter is sooooooo cute, and I enjoyed hearing her story about having to leave Africa (although I found it tragically sad). I'm impressed with her family that they were able to build a life literally from nothing once they moved here. I find that work ethic inspiring and I think it's wonderful that she tries to stay connected to her roots. I loved all the bright green and yellow in her collection, and I think the pairing with the snake skin is interesting - not necessarily my thing, but I can't wait to see how it all looks. In terms of her runway show, I didn't think it was as horrible as the judges made it seem. While I didn't like the top of her wedding dress, I liked her overall idea - especially that it wasn't white and traditional. Unlike the judges, I totally saw the connection between her wedding dress and her bridesmaid dress (why wasn't this an issue with Kenley's dresses? I saw zero connection there).

Jerell. I don't even know what to say about him. What we saw of his collection was truly... horrid. WAY to over done and over accessorized with nasty icky things. It didn't remind me of anything he'd done all season on the show, so it was way out of left field. I had been really excited to see what he had done. His wedding dress. Wow. I will say that I loved the bottom half. I liked how it was at the waist, and I loved how the tulle was so prominent at the bottom (although once Nina pointed out that it looked like white tulle that had gotten dirty, I agree that he should have used a different color there). I thought it was different and fashionable. However, once you looked above the waist, we had some MASSIVE problems. Tim pointed out that the poofy things around the boobs looked like a wardrobe malfunction, which I totally agree with (as did the judges). I'm not sure why he didn't agree, and why he didn't fix it. Then the jeweled shit under that... and then the jewels under all of that. Omg. It was like someone had gone crazy with a high priced bedazzler. I did like his bridesmaid dress, although I feel it was rather poorly put together (with all the puckering and all). I think he completely deserved to go home. And I wasn't a fan of the dig he took at Michael Kors in his parting "interview."

Now that we have our final 3, it's time for Bryant Park! Since fashion week was a while ago, the last 6 contestants got to show so there was no surprise that was ruined. Photos of all 6 collections are online, however I never like to look because I want to be as surprised as possible when I watch the show. I did take a look at the 3 losers collections, though, and here are Jerell, Suede, and Joe for your viewing pleasure.

And when is my hott reunion show where everyone gets all catty?! I'm going to be way upset if they don't do that this season. Always good drama!

Vote or Die?

I'm sitting here watching 20/20 (hott Friday night, huh?), and my boy John Stossel did a story questioning if everyone really should go out and vote.

As part of his story, he interviewed random people and asked them typical questions - how many states are there? how many senators are there? Can you identify the people in these pictures? Basically, it was clear that most people are idiots. Something like 75% of people can't name the Vice President. This just floors me. And people didn't know how many states there are! HOW COULD ANYONE NOT KNOW THIS?!

What's scary is the people who didn't know how many states there are or how many senators there are (the answers ranged from 12 total to 50 per state) were all interviewed at a thing that was getting young people registered to vote.

I have to say, I agree with John on this point. Should these idiots really be voting? There's this HUGE push to get people registered and out at the polls on election day. But should that be our focus? Should people who don't even know how many states there are and don't recognize a photo of Joe Biden be allowed to choose our leader? I definitely come from the belief that it is every one's civic duty to vote. People died to give us this right - DIED. It's not just a right, but it's a responsibility. However, I also think that everyone should be an INFORMED voter. Maybe the people who don't bother to be informed shouldn't be allowed to vote. Maybe there should be some sort of knowledge test. Not necessarily questions like "how many states are there?" (although, again, you're officially FIRED from life if you can't answer that), but questions that ask if people really understand who they're voting for - questions about policy, etc., that shows they're making an educated decision rather than voting for Obama because Madonna says McCain is evil (which, by the way, she's done in all of her concerts).

I don't care who you vote for (well... that's not true, but I'll keep my opinions on this to myself, as I don't want to get into a political debate), but I do care that you have a legitimate reason for voting for that person. I realize a test isn't practical, but hey, when have I ever been practical? I'm the girl that thinks everyone should be fixed at birth and shouldn't be allowed to be unfixed until they can pass a test that shows they can be responsible for another person. It's scary to think that people who don't even recognize a picture of a vice presidential candidate can be allowed to cast a ballot for one. Even scarier to think that that person might not even know how many states there are. Perhaps it shouldn't be "vote or die." Maybe we'd prefer some of these people to just stay home on election day if they can't bother to become informed voters before getting into line.

Coop cracks me up

Ok.... so Cooper, like all dogs, frequently has some wicked gas problems. And, like all dogs, it's usually silent, so you have no warning prior to being smacked in the face with a horrible smell.

Every once in a while, however, Cooper manages to squeeze one out that makes noise. Whenever this happens, it always catches him off guard and completely surprises him. He jumps up, turns around and looks at where his ass just was, sniffs around, and looks at me all confused, because he has no idea what that sound was or where it came from. I have to say, it makes the smell almost ok, because it's really entertaining whenever this happens. He acts all surprised and confused for about five minutes every time, and then, very upset that he couldn't find the source of the noise, he lays back down, but continues to act unsettled for several more minutes.

I know you probably don't need to know about my dog's farts, but I thought I'd share anyway. Feel special. : )