Wednesday, October 15, 2008

When Celebrity Fashion Goes Horribly Wrong

Here's a Fierce! fashion edition of celebrity news... because this stuff was just too good to pass up.

Madonna's so busted, she gets two mentions in this same post. Sad for her. First, these shoes. WTF was she thinking?! She rocked these Chanel shoes at the New York premier of her film "Filth and Wisdom." First - Chanel?! CHANEL made these?! When I think "Chanel," I think nice things like "timeless" and "classic," not "gangster toy guns." These things look like some horrible reject from the Maddox shoe line. Not to mention, the guns themselves look busted as hell. Like Maddox was running around playing with them for about a year, then got tired of them and threw them out in order to play with the new knife Angie and Brad just bought him. Chanel rooted through Brangelina's trash and snapped these puppies right up. So they're not even clean fugly shoes! What kind of statement was she trying to make here? I don't get it.

Moving on.... let's talk about her HAIR. This is something that bothers the shit out of me everywhere she goes. Here she is, all done-up in her weird ass expensive Chanel shoes and fancy dress for her own movie premier, and she couldn't even be bothered to dye her fucking roots?! COME ON. You have more money that God, Madge. FIX YOUR FUCKING HAIR. This is an issue EVERYWHERE she goes. Her big benefit for Malawi? ROOTS. Her 50th birthday party? ROOTS. All over her concerts? ROOTS. Premier for Guy's last movie? ROOTS. I don't get why this is so difficult for her. If you can't keep up with it, then don't dye it. You'd think her people would be more on top of this.

Another lucky lady with a double-mention! Because yes, it's just that tragic. Here she is looking like a bargain basement ho at Madonna's movie premier. Her hair looks trashtastic (and oddly just like Madonna's), but at least it's all the same color. Her face isn't looking... right... either. It's like... all dirty or something. I just want to scrub it with a brillo pad. But let's talk about the real tragedy here. Why WHY are her feet a totally different color from the rest of her body?! How could this have possibly happened?! We all know that shade of orange isn't natural, so someone did this to her. HAHAHAHAHAHA to them for 1. thinking of this and 2. actually getting away with it. The vajayjay lovin must be blocking what little good sense she has left.

I think what makes this better is she was photographed somewhere else with her multi-colored skin. Perez posted this picture the other day, which is clearly from a different event, as she's looking tragic in a totally different outfit. Haha... different outfit, but same shoes. I really don't like the checkered top on this thing. Or the one shoulder look. And it almost looks like her hands are white, too. Homegirl needs a new tanning company. Stat 1 2.
And, at both of these events, where was her accessory du jour, SamRo?! Does she skip out on things she has to shower before attending?

Hot.Tranny.Mess. That's really all that comes to mind when I see this picture. So much is wrong. First, her hair. I hate that haircut. Although, again, at least it's all one color (HELLO, Madonna!). The make-up. WOW. That lipstick is just criminal. Then the shirt. It's like a bad acid trip. And the leather pants. Never a fan of leather pants. And top the whole thing off with purple tranny-inspired platforms! FIRED. She needs new gays around her, because it's shameful they let her out the door looking like this.

0 opinions that are almost as important as mine: