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Sunday, November 23, 2008

Birthday Roundup

Ok... so yesterday was the last of the birthday festivities..... sorta. Lusty Lulu couldn't be there, so he's promised me a day of inappropriate photos wherever I want. We'll call that a sorta extension of the birthday fun. But for now, it's over.

Inebriated Erin and I went to the Wax and Spy museums yesterday. We decided to meet at Metro Center, since we live a bit away from each other and there was no point in one of us driving to the other's house prior to a long-ish drive to a metro station. Inebriated Erin left her house CRAZY early, and was at Metro Center before my train had left from Springfield. Apparently while she was waiting for me, she befriended a homeless man who gave her a flower. Awwww how sweet! : )

When we were finally both in the same place at the same time, we headed off to the Wax Museum. I knew what corner the joint was on, but I had no idea where it was in relationship to where we were when we arose from the depths of the metro. Some random dude asked if he could help us, and we of course said no because we didn't know who the fuck he was. We looked around and were still clueless (and VERY COLD), so I looked at some sign that was babbling about DC. A random person got all bitchy with me and said "ya know, that's what that guy over there is for," referring to the possibly sketch dude who'd attempted to talk to us before. So from a safe distance, I asked him if he knew where the wax museum was, and he gave me alllllllllllllllllllllllll kinds of bitchy attitude because I hadn't wanted to talk to him before. Let's take a brief timeout here. Inebriated Erin and I are two girls alone in DC, and some non-police officer dude is asking us if we need help. WHY would we say yes? My ultimate goal was to survive the day so I could later write about it. No need to get all bitchy with me just because I didn't get the memo that DC was putting random guys in random places to tell me where things are.

Anyrudeassbitch"helper"guy.... without looking up from his cell phone (RUDE!) he was able to stop being bitchy long enough to point us in the right direction, and we eventually found ourselves at the museum. It was fabulous and "really cool and awesome" and you should check out the photos from the experience.... MUCH inappropriateness took place.

Back to the metro to go just one little stop so we can check out the spy museum. I know... it's ridic to ride the metro one stop... I'm sure it was just 2 blocks or something crazy like that, but I didn't know what direction said 2 blocks were in, and I wasn't about to start wandering around in the FREEZING cold of the day, so metro it was!

We got to the spy museum and realized we were fairly hungry, so we popped into an eatery across the street for some food and beer (I was with Inebriated Erin, after all:-P). Inebriated Erin did a quick scan of their in-house brewed beers and naturally picked the one with the highest alcohol content - gotta get the most for your buck! Makes total sense in these harsh economic times. So we drank a little... and ate a little... and spent what felt like 203842035203483243 hours sitting there. In reality - only an hour. That place must have been in some weird ass time warp or something, but it seriously felt like 3 days.

Anyiswearwewerentdrunk.... we finally were off to the spy museum! I was WAY excited about this, as I'd heard from various people that it was fun and seriously - how could stuff about real life spies NOT be cool? To sum up the experience, I'll share a little exchange between me and Inebriated Erin:

Inebriated Erin: I SO thought this was going to be really cool and awesome.
Erika: Yeah, me too : ( But it.......
Inebriated Erin: ...... was NOT really cool and awesome.

The museum was just.... OOC. I felt smacked in the face with WAY too much information.... all in itty bitty type that I had to stand around reading... in the midst of 20384023483243 other people trying to do the same. There was a lot of interactive stuff, none of which we could take advantage of because of alllllllllllllllllllllll the people there.

We did get to see two things designed for spies to shove up their asses, one of which was HUGE. That was kinda cool.

The BEST part of that experience was the quiz. When we first got there, we were told to pick an identify from the 16 posted all over the place. It had basic info like name, age, where you're from, job, where you're going and why. They said you had to learn this info, but never said why. I picked some Italian girl because she was 21 (and the theme of this whole birthday has been about getting younger). She was a travel agent from Mirano, Italy going to Hanoi, Vietnam for 30 days on business... I think her name was Angelena Falcone. Erin picked some 26 year old Kenyan chick with a name she couldn't pronounce.

As we're walking around... just a few minutes after the "really cool and awesome" conversation, someone came up to us to QUIZ US about our identities. Now... it had been a significant amount of time since we'd read these things. This chick and dude were standing there and were like WHATS YOUR NAME?! I was like uuuuuuuuhhhhhh and I looked at Erin, who had to help me with the first name. After that, I was pretty good and they lied and said I was "convincing" at taking on this new identity (a MASSIVE lie because I didn't know my name, and I laughed through the whole thing). They gave me some kind of "you're a kick ass spy" sticker, and tried to give one to Inebriated Erin, since they assumed we were both this girl. I made it VERY clear that this was not the case, because if I had to be quizzed, so did she.

They asked her her name, and and all Inebriated Erin could come up with was "umm... it starts with an H!" and she spewed off almost all the other info about this girl. The two spy quizzers laughed and said something like "well... seems you know everything... BUT YOUR NAME," which they thought was comical.

They eventually found her little bio, and asked her where she was from. After 5 minutes or so, it was clear Inebriated Erin was never going to come up with this info, so they moved on. At this point, I was laughing hysterically. The quizzers both looked at me and were like "ma'am, this is SERIOUS," and basically gave me a look that said they were gonna take me out back and shoot me if I didn't stop. I attempted to get my game face (oooor spy face) on, but it didn't work well. They next asked Inebriated Erin "so what do you do for a living in the place we have yet to establish?" This of course got me laughing all over again, and Inebriated Erin was all ummmmmmm until they said "you look like you're good with money." Inebriated Erin was able to get the rest of her thing, except where she lived. They told her she was living in Kenya, let her keep her spy sticker, and we were on our way. By far, the highlight of the experience.

So that was our day! Good timez at the Wax Museum, intense quizzing at the Spy Museum, and a time warp over lunch.

Now we just need to find a place to take Lusty Lulu for the inappropriate pictures he promised me. If anyone has any ideas, let me know!

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